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My mind was thinking back to Gemma, the last woman I’d been with other than Jill. Before everything had gone sideways. When Jill and Chris got too close, and Chris asked Jill to leave me and head to Los Angeles with him.The high-end booze we’d enjoyed with the meal was doing nothing to help me keep a clear head, or to piece together the swirling confusion of feelings and emotions I was feeling. My cock was slowly filling just as my heart was feeling light and happy at the feeling of Dee by my side and the expectations of what might be.But this was finely balanced by the bittersweet pain and butterflies I was feeling as I stared jealously at Jill laughing and flirting with her new gentleman friend, feeling like a guy once again looking down over the edge of the precipice, with all of the recent traumatic feelings and memories this brought flooding back to the surface. The glands in my shoulders were alive and raw, fully in fight-or-flight mode. Normally an invisible part of my body,. Thehair was long enough that I could pull the far end round to my side,where I discovered a chestnut-coloured glossy mane of thick strands."I'm a brunette..." I thought to myself, the flowing dark locks adramatic contrast to the receding, short, greying crop I'd previouslybeen endowed with. Ridiculously, I thought for an instant that I'dhave rather been blonde.I moved my fingers back to touch my face curiously. I felt delicate,fine features with high cheekbones. This could only ever be a woman'sface - my skin was now baby-smooth and soft, without a trace of thestubble I was used to, and exploring further I felt the gentler femalejawline, and a smaller, pert nose. I touched my lips then, findingthem full and sensuous. In my former existence, I would charminglyhave called such lips "cocksucking".I looked round again at the empty space near my bench, and Iunderstood fully now that the sound I'd heard, the woman moaning,hadn't been a fellow survivor, but had been my own voice. I felt.
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